Body of Work! An Analysis
I’ve been analysing my work flow over the last couple of years and noticed a disturbing trend. Lets take Project Day and Night as an example! Truth is I could have finished the project a long time ago, but due to some limiting beliefs It still remains unfinished.
Ok… lets not get ahead of ourselves, so lets rewind a little to the other night
A good freind of mine came to my house for a little catchup, at one point we were infront of my PC so i showed him some of the work i had been doing over the last couple years. One thing most of them had in common wast they were not fully completed.
A head here with no textures, a unfinished body there with no limbs.
It felt like looking into a graveyard of projects that begun so promisingly and then left for dead with no thought of completion. The Mesh Graveyard!
My friend was like “I didn’t know you’d done all of this, they look real good..!”
I searched his face for a sarcasm, maybe a small tell-tale sign of him taking the piss. From what i could see he was being totally honest.
“Well…” I replied ” I didn’t think they were particularly good”
“Listen, if I could do any of that I would show the world, you don’t realise how much talent you’ve got man!, they look amazing”
As I stared at him with warm affection, yet wondering whether he needed his eyes examined, something hit me, Something I probably knew deep inside, but took my blind yet infinately wiser freind to help me realise. Over the last couple years I had been hard and unfair to myself and my work.
Because I had deamed my work not to be good enough I had robbed my self a chance to complete and see each peice fully realised thus had robbed my self a chance to improve (more so than i already have) and learn more. I’ve also proven my self to be foolhardy as I hadn’t shown most them on this blog. The whole point of the blog is to monitor my progress and improvements, so what’s the point of not showing any of my work? that takes away the whole purpuse of this blog!
I often tour the interwebs for art work (2d and 3d) at great sites like deviantart for fun and inspiration. Most of the work I see on these sites are so breathtaking, so awesome, it seems to makes my work pale in comparison. This often left me feeling extremely disappointed in my own work, which i would drop right then and start a new project in pursuit of perfection. I was chasing the horizon if you may.
I know, it sounds silly but that was my problem, thus till this day Project Night and Day remains unfinished.
I realised it is stupid to compare my work to those awesome artists, who probably do it professionally and have put in tens of thousands more hours than me into thier craft, why would my work match up?
This realisation has been very humbling! I guess previously I was coming from a place of ignorance and a bit of arrogance as I was too impatient to let my skills grow naturaly.
Now I am able to look at my work with new eyes. No, they are not the works of art I want them to be, and maybe they will never match up to the pro’s. But with each peice I improve dramatically especially when I see it all the way through.
If you are to take away anything from this wall of text ( honestly I didnt expect to write so much). Is to take your time and not chase the horizon. Perfection is an ever moving target, don’t get too caught up in catching it or you will miss all the great things you’ve done! Besides a great story is not about the beginning or the end but about the journey between the two.
- Good things in life just take time (philosophybychristy.wordpress.com)
- The Unfinished Swan: Video Games and God’s Story of Me (thehighcalling.org)
- The Unfinished (ekphrastixarts.com)